this weekend

....I'm going to a play, probably a movie, and maybe to Baltimore.

We're planning our summer, and we may go back to New York City, as well as the beach. I need both the city and the ocean this year.


Today wasn't so bad, at least for me. Though machines did still go spla, and there were short
tempers.

Nothing much, really, to report.

After a very rough morning..........

I seem to have reached some stability tonight. Thank the nonobject.

Today I'm actually grateful for the stupid rain. I can feel how the plants are just absorbing the water. The lone tulip will blow open again tomorrow afternoon and be waiting for me when I come home.

Somehow tonight I feel like I'm in my solitary boat in the ocean, seeing the shore from a great distance. I'm not a sea creature -- I belong on land. I need to walk the streets of cities, and up the paths of woods. I can sit quite happily on the beach and wave to them out on boats. There's a sense of bobbing up and down, not comfortable, but obscurely something I need to learn. I'm out here for a reason (there's always a reason). Perhaps I need to learn to read the seaweed? or the waveforms? Or commune with the stars -- second-best place to see them, on the ocean at night: utter best, to me, is in the mountains. UP as high as possible.

Yes, now here is peace for me: the stars at night.